I have tons of friends having babies, more than ever before. And it has prompted thoughts about being a new mom again. I have done the infant stage 3 times and I can tell you I am not an expert by any means. Anyone who says they are an expert is lying to themselves. No one knows exactly how every baby is going to respond to every situation. Those of us who have been there can give advice and suggestions, but we can only speak from our experience. There are a few pieces of advice I have found that every mom has been in agreement thus far.
Cry. You are exhausted physically, mentally, and emotionally. Your hormones are out of control. You are going to reach a breaking point and no matter how much you love your baby you are going to lose it. It’s okay. We’ve all been there. Cry. Have one of those deep from the gut ugly cries. Do it anytime you need. The middle of the day when you can’t get baby to eat or sleep or stop crying. The middle of the night when you are trying to figure out when the last time you slept more than an hour in a row. I have cried at all these times, it doesn’t make you weak. It makes you a mom.
Take a minute to yourself to just breathe. I know you are thinking ‘…when can I find time to myself?’ This is especially difficult when you have more than 1 baby. It doesn’t have to be long or far away. But step outside, by yourself at least once a day. Even if it’s just on the porch. Just sit or stand for a minute and breathe. Don’t think about the things you need to get done or what comes next in baby’s schedule. Just thank God for the day. That’s it. Just breathe and be.
Let your house go for as long as you need. I promise anyone who comes to visit could care less if you have dirty dishes or laundry. They want to see your baby and you (more so the baby). They don’t care it your floors have been mopped or your toilet has a ring. And if they do, don’t invite them over again. But do take people up on their offer to help. Let someone do your laundry, clean the bathroom, or make dinner. I promise at some point you will be able to do it all, but with a newborn it’s not worth trying.
Remember this most of all. You are doing fine. There is no right or wrong to this parenting thing. Breastfed or bottle fed. Swaddle…no swaddle. Stay at home mom or working mom. Cloth diaper or disposable. It doesn’t matter. Love your baby and you are doing it right.
All the pictures are the first ones of me with my new babies. I may not look great, but I was happy as could be.
